CHILD ABUSE PREVENTION

Child wellness, child welfare organizations and youth-serving organizations like the Y elevate the importance of creating systems and programs that put children and families first.

At the Y, creating safe spaces for youth to learn, grow and thrive is our top priority. That’s why throughout this week, we are providing tips and advice for parents and caregivers to help prevent and spot child abuse.

Our Y is fully committed to protecting youth from abuse in our community, and we are asking you to join us.

As a community, we have an obligation to nurture our children and protect their only childhood. We must prevent child sexual abuse to live up to this obligation. A key tool in abuse prevention is knowledge, so it’s important that parents and caregivers are informed of the Y’s policies around children. Together we can work to ensure all children in Greater Nashua region reach their full potential.

Tips and advice for parents and caregivers to help prevent and spot child abuse.

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Our Commitment to Child Safety

The development of children is the core of which the Y’s values were built. This is why the safety of all children in our care is our number one priority. Staff and volunteers at the YMCA of Greater Nashua follow our Commitment to Child Safety to ensure the safety of all children who come through our doors, whether they’re regular program participants or only visit once a year.

During Child Abuse Prevention Month, the Y wants to make sure that all members understand this Commitment to Child Safety. A key tool in abuse prevention is knowledge, so it’s important that parents and caregivers are informed of the Y’s policies around children. Together we can work to ensure all children in Greater Nashua region reach their full potential.

Click Here to download Our Commitment to Child Safety Brochure for more details.

In addition to our Commitment to Child Safety, the Y also has a number of safety measures intended to keep kids safe. This includes criminal background checks on staff and volunteers; required staff training on recognizing and preventing abuse; prohibiting staff/volunteers from being alone with a child where they cannot be observed by others; limiting staff contact with children outside of Y programs; and reporting any allegations or suspicions of abuse to law enforcement.

We also participate in Darkness to Light’s 5 Days of Action annually, this year it’ll be held in April 15-19, more info to follow as we get closer.

If you have questions about the Y’s Commitment to Child Safety, please contact any of the following staff:

• Jennifer Colangelo, Director of Human Relations at jcolangelo@nmymca.org or 603.689.2062

• Mike LaChance, CEO at mlachance@nmymca.org or 603.689.2413

• Elizabeth Witmer, Childcare Director at ewitmer@nmymca.org or 603.689.2421

• Kristie Perrault, Assistant Childcare Director at kperrault@nmymca.org or 603.689.2068

• Joe Manzoli, COO at jmanzoli@nmymca.org or 603.689.2420

   

Recognizing Boundary Violations and Warning Signs

At the Y, creating safe spaces for youth to learn, grow and thrive is our top priority – especially following the effects of the COVID-19 pandemic. Kids need a safe space now more than ever, and we take pride in the measures we’ve taken to help keep your kids safe. Here are some important tips for parents to know as we work together to keep kids safe from abuse.

Offenders seek three things in order to abuse: access, privacy and control.

What does this mean for a parent?

Know who has access to your children. For example,

• When your children are at school, what are the school’s procedures for screening staff, volunteers, parents, etc.?

• When your children attend a sleepover, who will be in the home?

Know what type of privacy is allowed. For example,

• When your children play sports, can the coach be alone with a player?

• When camp is over, can the counselor text your child?

• When the program ends, is one adult ever alone with one child?

Know how offenders gain control through boundary violations. For example,

• Physical boundaries violations – Excessive tickling, hugging, massaging, etc.

• Emotional boundaries violations – Spending too much time with them; acting possessive; sharing personal information to make a child feel they have a special relationship, sending excessive or inappropriate texts or messages

• Behavioral boundaries – Offenders manipulate kids into doing things they wouldn’t otherwise do, such as: – Sneaking around – Keeping secrets – Looking at pornography – Use of drugs or alcohol

Talking with Your Children About Abuse

Many parents and caregivers find speaking to their children about abuse to be uncomfortable. Framing these conversations around other safety conversations you have may help you work through some of that uncomfortableness. Below you’ll find age-appropriate ways to talk to your child about boundaries and preventing abuse.

Young Children

Parents can start these conversations simply by ensuring young children know the correct names for their body parts. Children who know the proper names are able to talk more clearly to parents or other adults if something inappropriate happens. As you’re teaching body part names, you can help your child learn that parts of their body are private and that only their parents/caregivers can see them. Don’t forget to note that doctors may see them naked but only because you’re there with the doctor!

Equally important is to teach children boundaries both for themselves and for others. Boundaries have easily teachable moments, such as when a child doesn’t want to hug a relative, or during a tickle fight a child yells “Stop!”. Allowing young children to set their own boundaries teaches them body autonomy and helps them know when something makes them uncomfortable so that they can speak up.

Many abusers will tell a child to keep abuse a secret. It’s important that children understand that adults should never ask them to keep a secret, and if they do, they should tell you.

Teens

As children grow older, it’s key to keep lines of conversation open, so that they feel comfortable talking to parents or trusted adults if something happens to them or a friend. Talk to your teens about their friends, the other adults in their lives, social media and electronic communication. They need to know to not accept requests from people they don’t know, how to respond if someone (even a friend) asks them to send nude photos and that conversations online are never truly private. Continue the conversations about boundaries and what boundary violations look and feel like. Let them know that you are there to listen and support them.

Listening and Responding to Children

We’ve addressed the importance of understanding the Y’s abuse prevention policies, recognizing red flags and boundary violations and how to talk with your children about abuse. Now, it’s important that all parents and caregivers know how to respond to boundary violations and warning signs if children tell you about abuse. At the Y, we are mandated reporters, so we have procedures in place for responding and reporting suspected abuse. As a parent, you can follow these 5 steps:

• 1.  Keep your eyes & ears open

• 2.  Talk with your child

• 3.  Ask your child about any concerns you have.

• 4.  If what you learn from your child or what you have observed/overheard sounds like abuse, call Child Protective Services or the police.

• 5.  If what you’ve heard or observed sounds like a boundary violation, suspicious or inappropriate behavior, or a policy violation:

  • a. Share your concerns with the employee/supervisor/person in charge of the organization.

  • b. If you are unable to do this, make a report to the organization by making a call, sending an email, or submitting an online form.

About YMCA of Greater Nashua

The YMCA of Greater Nashua is a positive force in the Greater Nashua community fully committed to preventing child abuse. Together, with our community partners, we take on the challenges that shape our area’s future. From tackling the achievement gap to teaching healthy habits for a lifetime or giving people the chance to strengthen our community through volunteering, everything the Y does is in service of building a better us.